No. 20: TRIO (Scaphio, Phantis & Tarara)
"With wily brain upon the spot"
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Scaphio. | Phantis. | Tarara. |
I think we ought — (whispers) | ||
Such bosh I never heard! | Such bosh I never heard! | |
Ah! happy thought! — (whispers) | ||
How utterly dashed absurd! | How utterly dashed absurd! | |
I'll tell you how — (whispers) | ||
Why, what put that in your head? | Why, what put that in your head? | |
I've got it now — (whispers) | ||
Oh, take him away to bed! | Oh, take him away to bed! | |
Oh, put him to bed! | ||
Oh, put him to bed! | ||
What, put me to bed? | ||
Yes, certainly put him to bed! | Yes, certainly put him to bed! | |
But, bless me, don't you see — | ||
Do listen to me, I pray — | ||
It certainly seems to me — | ||
Bah — this is the only way! | ||
It's rubbish absurd you growl! | ||
You talk ridiculous stuff! | ||
You're a drivelling barndoor owl! | ||
You're a vapid and vain old muff! You're a vain old muff! |
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You're a drivelling barndoor owl! | You're talking ridiculous stuff! | |
A drivelling, drivelling | You're a vapid and vain old muff! | Ridiculous, |
Drivelling barndoor owl! | A vain old muff! | Ridiculous, ridiculous stuff! |
All Three. (coming down to audience) |
So far we haven't quite solved the plot — They're not a very ingenious lot — But don't be unhappy, It's still on the tapis, We'll presently hit on a capital plot! |
Scaphio. | Phantis. | Tarara. |
Suppose we all — (whispers) | ||
Now there I think you're right. Then we might all — (whispers) |
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That's true, we certainly might. I'll tell you what — (whispers) |
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We will if we possibly can. Then on the spot — (whispers) |
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Bravo! A capital plan! | Bravo! A capital plan! | |
That's exceedingly neat and new! | ||
Exceedingly new and neat. | ||
I fancy that that will do. | ||
It's certainly very complete. | ||
Well done you sly old sap! | ||
Bravo, you cunning old mole! | ||
You very ingenious chap! | ||
You intellectual, intellectual soul! | ||
You very ingenious chap! | Bravo, you cunning old mole! | |
You very ingenious, ingenious | You intellectual | You cunning, you cunning, |
Ingenious chap! | -Lectual, -lectual chap! | You cunning old chap! |
All Three. (coming down to audience) |
At last a capital plan we've got We won't say how and we won't say what: It's safe in my noddle — Now off we will toddle, And slyly develop this capital plot! At last a capital plan we've got We won't say how and we won't say what: It's safe in my noddle — Now off we will toddle, And slyly develop this capital plot! |
Business. Exeunt Scaphio and Phantis in one direction, and Tarara in the other.
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Page Created 9 December, 2005